Thursday is so close, yet so far.

This week, THIS WEEK! I move back to California to these little ones.

Also, my stomach is still far too full from Indian food. Oh how I love that stuff.

Help me understand

In Ether chapter 12 (Ether is a book within the Book of Mormon) there is a verse which reads "...I would show unto the world that faith is things which are hoped for and not seen..." then a little bit later on another verse "Wherefore, ye may also have hope, and be partakers of the gift, if ye will but have faith."

Does this not seem a conundrum? We get faith by hoping for things, we get hope by having faith in things? Perhaps the problem is that I am looking at it as if hope and faith were on a single level. Get one, check it off the list. But if I suppose it is as it more likely in reality is, that it is an eternal cycle of hoping for something until you have faith in it, which causes a hope in something greater?

This is the beginnings of my thoughts. Please, thoughts would be appreciated.

One last thought, I absolutely LOVE my Heavenly Father and Christ and the Holy Ghost. I am so happy that they are in my life and that I get to become more like them and become their friend.

Ping pong

You know on movies when people watch a ping pong game and a group of heads looks left, then right, then left, back and forth over and over again? Well, that is somewhat how I feel about my living arrangements. I have moved back and forth between California and Utah enough to feel like a ping pong game. And it is happening again.

May 17th I'll move once more to the blessed Silicon Valley. This time living at home because I just don't see any reason to pay TONS in rent when my parents have room for me. Which also means that I will be living in a home with a dog. I don't think words alone can express my joy at that prospect. AND I'll be living near my little ones.

This is exciting.

I love my job.

I don't dread Mondays. AT ALL. Why? Cause I get to play with kids every day for work. Also, sometimes this happens. (Long hair is Rambo, short hair is Rocky. They are 11 month old Pyrenees/Lab mixes. They play in a grassy area across the street from us and I LOVE THEM!!!!)

Q has played with them twice before. First time one of them jumped on his back and he fell face first in the snow. Of course I plopped him back on his feet, wiped the snow off, and told him to tell the dog "no jumping" even though he wanted comfort. Had I simply picked him up and sympathized with him, he'd be scared of them! And that is unacceptable. As is he now loves them and wants to play with them all the time. His version of play? Running with sticks that he doesn't share with them.

J wasn't so sure about them. At first she stayed on the other side of the fence until she got more confidence and came in. She typically likes dogs, but tends to be a little timid around big puppies like these cuties.

Answers

Have you ever prayed for knowledge about something, set your sights about fifteen degrees above the horizon and figured you'd have to study for hours a day to get there? Then, within two days, without having started what appeared to be a daunting course, Heavenly Father gives you an easy resource that already gets you up to about thirty degrees above the horizon with easy guidance for studying out the rest.

It has happened to you? Good!! It just happened (again) to me. I wanted to further understand how to protect oneself from the adversary. I know that turning to God is a huge part of it, but ignoring the enemy seems, well, it wasn't sitting right. I knew that the scriptures would have guidance on it, but I didn't really know where to start.

I dropped by a friends home yesterday afternoon (she wasn't home, so I hung out with the dog and turned on a movie until she got there. Yup, she's that sort of friend). Well. We got to talking about all sorts of things once she got home, all centered on Christ and what we have learned recently about what we can do to be more like Him (yup, she's that sort of friend).

She mentioned a book I should read. She had me read a section that pertained to what I've been learning while with her. I don't agree one hundred percent with what was written, BUT it has opened my eyes to different views, and the fact that I need to ask a whole LOT more questions. She let me borrow it for the night, to return today. (Mom, stop reading here.) I stayed up probably till 3 or 4 reading, and I'm not done yet.

So many questions were answered and I now have so much clarity about HOW to study out more.

I am so very happy that Heavenly Father loves us and is willing to teach us just about anything we ask about, and wants us to return to him. I am so happy that Jesus Christ gave his life for us that we are able to return to them if we continually repent and ask for the power of the atonement in our lives. I am so happy that the Holy Ghost can be our constant companion to guide us and prompt us in all our righteous endeavors.

Spanx

I used to love my Spanx. Made everything nice and smooth. But here is the thing, I used to hate my body. Always wanted to change it. Something happened recently, and I have no idea what, but that has changed. Even though I haven't miraculously lost 40 pounds, I absolutely love my shape, excess curve and all.

Now the strange thing that has occurred. I wore the spanx with a skirt for church. I felt fat and gross and unattractive all day. I got home and took it off, but kept the skirt on. Looked in the mirror. All of a sudden I felt gorgeous!

Turns out, products that are meant to change us from "bad" to "good" are a great way for companies to make us feel as though there is something wrong with us when using them, thus we need to keep using them! But fortunately, I no longer have this problem.

Hurrah for feeling wonderful in our own skins!!!

My normal?

Just found out that my mother and one of my best friends both think that I have been acting depressed since October-ish. This has led me to two hypothesis.

First. During this time I have felt fine. Granted, I'm taking care of two kids and am tired a lot, but not terribly sad most of the time. I've felt relatively happy. So... does this mean that my normal is, well, depressed? That is rather unfortunate.

Second. I gave up television for a year starting October 17th. Maybe I need television to make me happy?!

ADDITION:
My roommate mentioned something. I've become a little complacent with my life. In a sort of limbo with progression. This is not the same as depressed. However, if I am usually in a state of trying to better myself (as I have been for a few years) then get into limbo, it could appear as if depressed. I think this might be the actual explanation. Time to shake things up and start progressing again!